This is a WIP made from really cheap Spotlight material (the spotty stuff, $4 a meter) and one of Siena's old sun dresses that I couldn't get rid of because the fabric is just so vivid and beautiful. I will be able to post better, finished pictures on Sunday, hopefully on the receiver - stay posted, pics could be very good.
I was reading over my posts from when I first started this blog, and I feel so proud of myself for continuing with it. I realise that I am a bit of a work in progress also. I was reading a particular post about how angry and fed up I was with Eva's refusal to eat and just feeling perplexed why something that seems like the most natural thing in the world will not come naturally to her. At this point (I mean today, as tomorrow I could feel totally different) I am quite at peace with it. Learning to relinquish control over things that I have no power to change has been by far the BIGGEST hurdle I have come across. I am not there yet but I am getting better everyday.
I used to get so stressed out going to the paediatrian's office as I knew he would weigh her and I knew that waight gain would be minimal or not at all. I felt so irresponsible and inadequate if her weight hadn't changed. I was overwhelmed by my role as Eva's mum and just felt most of the time like a huge failure. Now I realise that I feed her the right amount everyday and if she vomits I can't change that, if she gets sick I can't change that or if nothing happens and she still doesn't gain weight then I have done all I can.
Eva is so loved and so cherised, she is thriving in her own slow way and that is cool with me.
4 comments:
Oh man, its so amazing to hear / read you say / write that. She is doing so well, she is so happy and SO loved (omg, she is just everybody's favourite). She will do this with your help and no amount of wishing and hoping will make her do this faster (or with less heartache). She's such a fabulous child, I know Bec and I look forward to seeing her.
I hope you're not making me something with those materials. While I think they are nice, they're just not my colours.
Everybody seems to always have an opinion on kids weight. Grace used to be in the 90th percentile and then she hit a year and dropped to the 50th. The Dr. actually questioned me as to whether or not I was feeding her properly (and myself for that matter!). She is still only between the 25th and 50th and yet people tell me 'oh she must be a good eater' and 'I love how chunky she is'. If only they actually KNEW her weight :) I have learned all we can do is offer them healthy food, and they get to choose how much of it they will eat. Eva looks like a good strong healthy girl - you are doing a great job!
Thanks so much Carmen, hearing other mum's angst with their own kids weight makes you feel not so alone. Poor Eva is still trying to catch up on the first 6 months of life when she was so sick and in hospital for so long. She will get there.
that is so true. i used to stress about the silliest things - like what avery should wear to preschool. to think i actually "fought" with a three year old over clothes. wisdom and patience and acceptance are hard earned rewards for parents, and well worth the wait.
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